Is a demon supposed to love or hate?
by Bamfing Bob
Summary: The story of young Kurt Wagner Nightcrawler and the troubles he encounters as a devilish mutant.
1. The Little Devil

The Little Devil By Bamfing Bob 

"And here's the big tent", said the large man with a shaggy beard and a strong Hungarian accent. He was walking with a slightly shorter man with a similar beard wearing a dirty torn trench coat and they were both completely soaked from the storm outside. "You can stay here for the night, brother. It's not the warmest place in the world but it will keep you dry for the time being."

At that, a bolt of lightning struck, soon followed by a deafening crash of thunder. A pair of glowing yellow eyes floating in the air suddenly opened in the darkness that was the Big Top. The shorter man uttered an obscenity under his breath at the eerie sight. The creature to which the eyes belonged did a somersault and landed some 20 feet from where they appeared.

"Donal, who is your friend?", asked the mysterious voice that slowly walked into the light. He seemed like a demon but the mannerisms of it seemed harmless. It's skin was slowly becoming visible into an indigo and had striking features on his hands, feet, and face. It had fanged teeth like that of a canine and ears that end in a sharp point. His feet looked like a birds, with two toes in the front and one in the back, and his hands had only three fingers. It also had the tail of the devil himself, swaying as he walked cautiously toward the two men. He wasn't a day older than fifteen.

"This is my brother, Randel. Randel, I would like you to meet our circus' top acrobat, Mr. Kurt Wagner. He usually sleeps hanging from his feet on the trapeze. I hope you don't mind."

"Not at all. I just hope you're not contagious. Ha ha."

"I'm not diseased, you asshole! I'm just different okay! God!", yelled the now pissed off Kurt as he quickly climbed up to the highest trapeze in the room, disappearing from view.

"Way to be polite, Randel. Don't you think he's a little sensitive about his looks? Kurt's a great guy. Get to know him before you run off at the mouth again, okay?"

"It was just a harmless joke!", he yelled as Donal dashed out of the tent, "I meant nothing by it!". Randel laid out his bedroll, took off his dripping coat, and tried to go to sleep but he couldn't because those yellow eyes were looking straight down at him unblinking all night long. The guilt of his comment slowly crept up and down his spine. He wondered how it must feel to be an outsider; different from everybody else in the world. To be truly alone.

"Wake up." Randel groggily rubbed his eyes as he straggled through the mud toward the common tent for the breakfast he could already smell from a distance. The flaps of the tent were already tied open and he could see a dozen or so people at a long table covered in dishes full of eggs, sausage, pancakes, and orange juice which the people were grabbing at furiously.

"Everyone! This is my brother, Randel. He will be staying with us for a few weeks while his house is being rebuilt. It was in a fire Tuesday afternoon so treat him as you would want to be in his situation. He came in last night during the storm. Randel, this is Stephan, Hans, Jaime …", who all waved accordingly," David, Margali, Rochelle, Amanda, Moira, Basil, Rochen, and I believe you've already met Kurt."

At the sound of his name, Kurt looked up from his plate and quickly stared back at it in disgust. Randel sat down and started to load his plate with all of the persuasive leftovers of the performers who surrounded him. He felt like his life was falling apart; first his wife and kids deserted him, then his house burned down, and now he was visiting a circus where he felt … less than welcome, at least by the little teen demon who silently sat next to him.

"Kurt, I'm sorry about last night. I didn't know you were so offended by your looks and I've been under a lot of stress and I was trying to make light of an awful situation and…"

"What? Sleeping in the same room with a freak? Apology not accepted."

"I just want to…", started Randel.

"Start all over?", finished Kurt. "You can't change the past, just the future. If you want my friendship or acceptance or whatever, you'll have to treat me like everyone else and think about what you say before you say it." Then, he got up and hastily paced out of the tent without bothering to give his dishes to Margali, who was scrubbing the tableware with an SOS pad.

"Think nothing of it… Randel, wasn't it?" asked Margali. "He's always been the moody type, you know, sitting in the corner and ignoring people. Once he gets used to you, you'll feel much more welcome here, just wait and see."

"LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! Boys and girls!", announced the booming voice of Hans, " Presenting, the world's greatest acrobat, at only fourteen years old, the great Kurt WAGNER!"

At this, the crowd of less than a hundred cheered with no restraint as they gazed to the top of the circus tent to see the boy in the red, white, and black outfit and covered in blue makeup. Kurt waved and leaped into the air as if he were flying. He did a double back flip, twisting and turning in a way that no ordinary person could do. Grabbing the trapeze bar with his feet, that must have been twenty feet away from the platform, the audience roared with suspense, for even though they know he wouldn't fall, their stomachs still lurched at this spectacle. His performance was unlike any Randel had ever seen, even disregarding the fact that Kurt held on to the bars with his feet and tail. After all the autographs were signed and the crowd started to disperse, Randel approached the star of the circus.

"Kurt, that was incredible! Whatever you're doing, don't stop." Kurt chuckled at this but quickly remembered his feelings toward Randel.

"Wow, I didn't know you could smile! How come the sudden change in attitude?"

"When I perform, I get a natural high from the reactions of the audience. They think I'm just wearing makeup so no one is scared or judges me and stuff."

"Well, anyway, you were phenomenal and I'm glad you are so happy when you fly through the air", said Randel, who began to walk away.

"Hey!", called Kurt to Randel, who turned around in mid-stride. "Thanks."

Kurt was on his way back to his trailer when his attention was called to a figure silently following him. He whipped around to discover a beautiful older girl who giggled as his tail smacked him in his face. "Hello, Kurt Wagner. I just want to tell you that I loved your performance and that I was wondering if you wanted to go somewhere with me." She had long black hair and the most captivating green eyes.

"You know that I'm fourteen, right?"

"And I'm sixteen. What's your point?"

"Okay. Let's go to my trailer so I can change."

They started to walk together to his dressing room when Kurt asked "So, what's your name?"

"Eva. How did you do all that up there? I was absolutely stunned by the performance."

"I don't know. I've always been more flexible than the others, but I guess just working at it make me 'the world's greatest acrobat.'"

Eva giggled again as he entered his room to change. As he dressed, they made small talk through the door. "What kind of music are you into, Kurt?"

"Anything dark. There's a certain amount of irony in that, isn't there?"

"What do you mean?"

"What do you mean 'What do you mean'? You've met me haven't you?", asked Kurt as he stepped out, now in blue jeans and a sweatshirt.

"I don't understand. Why haven't you taken off your make-up?"

"What make-up? I'm not wearing any make-up."

"You're kidding, right?

"Nope. This is the way I look. I thought you knew that."

"Oh my God, I can't do this!", screamed Eva as she ran away from the boy she had grown to like as a friend, and maybe more. Perhaps this is why she was so afraid - the realization that someone who lived like everybody else could look as horrible as this was too much to handle all at once.

There he sits. Alone in his corner. All alone. With no one to comfort him for nobody knows what it is like to be forever in the midst of bigotry and hatred in the way he does. No one even knows he's there, even though you can hear the faint weeping of a child who has so often heard the gasps of horror upon looking at him, but never has he felt so depressed. He wishes that he were dead. So, he goes into his stepmother's room and gets her gun. Still crying madly, he cocks the handgun and points it to his left temple. BANG!


	2. Stepping into the Light

Stepping into the light 

"What are you doing, Kurt!", yells Randel as he slams the door open. "Oh my God, just drop the gun Kurt. It's okay, everything's fine. Whatever you're going through, we can work through it. Just drop the gun! KURT!"

Still sobbing, Kurt lets the pistil drop to the ground and collapses into a pile of worthlessness with no concerns, no love, no feeling, just utter discontentment inside himself hoping to escape through the hole the bullet would create. Randel hurries to Kurt's aid, with concern in his eyes for the little blue devil he had grown to care for over the last few days. "Help! Somebody help us! Kurt's in trouble, a doctor, someone! Some…one…" He huddles over the boy, as though protecting him from the world.

His eyes slowly open as he becomes conscious after his coma that seemed to last forever. His vision is still quite blurred; the light swarmed into his pupils causing a head rush comparable to a tidal wave. As his eyes adjust, he discovers that he is in a hospital bed in a room made of stone bricks. He hardly remembers what happened before his awakening, only pain and overwhelming emotions. Why has this happened to him? What has he done to deserve his skin, hands, tail?

Then, he notices the newcomer, Randel, sleeping in a bedside chair, probably since the night before. Slowly, he stirs in his sleep and arrives in reality, waking up to find Kurt awake sitting up in his bed.

"Why, hello, my young friend! Feeling better, I hope?"

"Uh, yeah. What happened to me? I feel dead."

"Don't say that. You nearly committed suicide. I caught you with the gun pointed to your head. Your lucky day."

"Why? What happened?"

"I don't really know. You were muttering something about a girl under your breath. Rita, or something like that."

"Eva, now I remember. She asked me out, but when she found out that this is how I actually look, she ran. I stood there with a blank look on my face until I black out and can't remember a thing. What's going to happen to me?"

"Honestly, I don't know. God has put a lot on your plate and there's nothing you can do about it. But, you can change your outlook on it. You have really been blessed, you know. You have something no one else has. Cherish it. Your can disappear from sight in the shadows. You are the best acrobat in Germany, probably the world. Your tail and feet help you in your daily life. Don't you see… you are unique, Kurt. These things you have problems with are not a necessarily bad thing."

"But, everyone is scared of me and nobody loves me…"

"Nonsense! Your family loves you dearly and…"

"You know they're not my real family, right? My real mom hated me. She put me in a blanket on the river. Margali found me."

"Oh. Why, then, do you think she brought you home with her? She could have left you there to die but she saw that you were only different on the outside. So, yes, they do love you. So does God."

"Yeah, God really loves me. I'm a freak, Randel! I'm covered in blue fur! Do you know what it's like for people to think that you are the devil! Huh? God hates me, he never loved me or he wouldn't have made me this way! Look, I have three fingers! Three! I should have killed myself while I had the chance." A tear slowly runs down his face as he continues to explain himself inaudibly through sobs and gasps. Randel leans over and give Kurt a big hug, giving him a shoulder to cry on.

"Shhh, shhh. It's gonna be okay. If it helps, I love you. What can I do to help? Let it all out. Shhh, shhh."

After Kurt is done weeping, he asks "You… you l-love me? R-really?".

"Of course I do. I wouldn't have said it if it wasn't true."

"Thank you. I'm sorry for being such a jerk to you earlier this week. I should have gotten to know you too."

"No need to apologize to me. You were right to be mad. I would be. This is a little off subject, but would you like to go with me to mass on Sunday, Kurt? Maybe you can feel better and learn that God really does love you."

"Okay." A knock on the door suddenly broke the silence of the solemn room. "Come on in", say Kurt as he wipes he face and straightens up. The door opens as Eva steps into the room. "Go away. I don't want to talk to you right now."

"Then you can just listen. Please, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings and certainly lead you to… kill yourself, but you must understand that I didn't understand. I know that you must hate me right now but give me a second chance. The shock of discovering that you were … different … made me say things that I normally would not. Please."

"I'll have to think about it, but thanks for coming. It means a lot to me."

Eva headed for the door slowly. Then she turned and said, "Oh yeah, I still think you're cute."


	3. Light on his Path

Sorry I haven't put a disclaimer on the last two Chapters, slipped my mind. I do not own Nightcrawler or any character related to him. I simply elaborate on the character created by Marvel.

Light on his Path

Kurt finally started to feel human. He didn't know why but he had a turning point. I guess after trying to commit suicide over a girl that actually liked him brought him back to reality. It has been a few days since that disturbing day and Kurt's life has improved drastically. He and Eva have been on a date and she seems to really like him for who he is. I guess blue is her color. Kurt doesn't feel like a freak anymore.

Today is Sunday. Kurt is kind of nervous about going to mass. He has never been before and since his looks give most the impression of anything but holiness, fear of the believers' reactions is not unexpected.

"Come on Kurt. Don't be too afraid. If anything goes wrong, I'll protect you. And we'll sit in the back."

"Thanks Randel. For everything."

" For what?"

"Everything; For inviting me to church, for being there when I needed you, for being accepting of me. You have really brought me through this. Thank you."

"Well you're welcome. I want you to feel safe around people. And I think all you lack right now is something to really believe in. After you."

The church bells had been rung to acknowledge that mass was about to start. Randel and Kurt came in through the back and sat in the farthest row from the pulpit. There were several whispers and mutterings about the blue kid in the back by some of the older members of the church.

"Don't worry about them. It's not your problem; it's theirs.", said Randel, assuring to Kurt that all was well.

"Good evening, brothers and sisters. I am so glad that all of you could make it here. For those of you who don't know me, I am Father Hoffman and I am the head priest of Saint Peter's Catholic Church. Would you please bow with me in prayer. Our most gracious heavenly Father, we come to you today for forgiveness of our sins and to give glory to your name. If there are any among us who have not heard of your acts of wonder, let them be reached today, O Lord. Father, let us confess with our tongues but to also believe with our hearts that in all times of trouble and joy, thou art with us. And we pray as you taught us: Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day, our daily bread, and forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors. And lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom and power and the glory forever. Amen. Now would you turn to chapter 69 of the Book of Psalms.  
"And it reads: Save me, O God, for the waters have come up to my neck. I sink in the miry depths where there is no foothold. I have come into the deep waters; the floods engulf me. I am worn out calling for help; my throat is parched. My eyes fail, looking for my God. Those who hate me without reason outnumber the hairs on my head; many are my enemies without cause, those who seek to destroy me. I am forced to restore what I did not steal. You know my folly O God; my guilt is not hidden from you. May those who hope in you not be discouraged because of me, O Lord, the Lord Almighty; may those who seek you not be put to shame because of me, O God of Israel. For I endure scorn for your sake, and shame covers my face. I am a stranger to my brothers, an alien to my own mother's sons…."

"Father Hoffman, your message deeply touched me. Thank you for giving it to me. May I become a member of this church?"

Kurt says this reluctantly for the honorable priest had looked weary of him throughout the service. Of course, who could blame a man of God to be suspicious of a demon in the back row? "Of course you may join the church. Although I am concerned that you may be mistreated here, I am confident that you will grow as a man of God, and hopefully so will the others through tolerance."

"Thank you Father. I shall prove to them that appearances truly are deceiving."


	4. Beauty and the Beast

Again, I don't own any Marvel characters, but I do own the ones I made up. J

Beauty and the Beast

He is in love with her. And she's not sure if she feels the same way. What will people think? Could she live with someone who looks as Kurt does? Eva truly has feelings for him and finds him attractive in an unexplainable way, but would she want him to father her children? To give her family the reputation of freaks? Why do her heart and mind fight as they do? And her father doesn't even know…

"Do you love me?", Kurt asks Eva, already knowing that the answer will be 'No'.

She is quiet for a moment for she hadn't expected him to blurt it out the way he did. "You know I really like you as more than a friend, but I'm confused. You don't know what it's like to want something knowing that the consequences are less then what you'd hope for them to be."

"The way I look?"

"Exactly. You know I like the way you look, especially your tail and fuzzy skin, but everyone else…"

"Yes, I know. Lord, do I know. But do you want to break up?"

"No, you know I want to stay with you." She kisses him lightly on the lips, showing her sweet affection for him. Why! She IS in love with him, but can't bring herself to the words. Fear is all that restrains her, because if she confesses her true feelings for him, then everything will change. Their relationship will be made public, and she will be thought as much of a monster as Kurt. Her father… he cannot stand anything aside from normal. Oh, the controversy. "I love you, Kurt."

They slept together for the first time that night. Both had never felt so alive before. It was as though they were one person in two bodies, bound by love yet separated by society. Only one endeavor remained. Time to meet her father.

"Are you nervous, Kurt?"

"Not when I'm with you, angel."

They stood outside Eva's cabin, shaking due to the cold and the anxiety. "Okay. I'll go in first to prepare him for the surprise and you come in when I call for you. Okay fuzzy?"

"Alright, but I might freeze my tail off."

"Well don't do that! (I'll need it for the next time wink wink)"

She enters the home and sees her father sitting in a wicker chair smoking a pipe in front of the fireplace. "Daddy…"

"Dammit Eva! Where were you last night! You had me worried sick! I have the police looking for you right now!"

"If you are so worried, why aren't you helping search?"

"Don't be a smartass, you ungrateful bitch!" He slaps her in the face with the back of his hand and says "For your information, I wanted to go help but the cops told me to stay here in case you came back. I argued for you! Where were you? And it better be good or no food for a week!"

"Well…" says Eva, knowing she would have nothing to eat and fearing his reaction, "I met someone… a boy…"

"What did you do last night!"

"I became a woman."

"This is an outrage! Now no man will want to marry you!"

"That is not a problem, because I am going to marry Kurt Wagner."

"Who in the hell is Kurt Wagner!"

"Hey Kurt! Come in!"

The door is slowly pushed open and Kurt walks in. Eva's father's face suddenly goes blank, jaw dropped, eyes wide. He is speechless as Kurt walks up beside Eva and holds her hand.

"This is the thing that defiled my sweet, innocent daughter? This… this beast!"

"This beast has a name. And he only looks different on the outside. He's just like everyone else on the inside."

"Bullshit! He is a monster without a soul and because of him, you will be filled with the seed of evil forever!"

"Don't you ever call him evil again! I love him and he loves me, and there is nothing you can do to change that!

"Wanna bet!" He goes behind the table as Kurt steps in front of Eva to protect her from what ever her father may do to her. He pulls out a shotgun and aims it right at Kurt. Kurt is terrified. All he wants now is to be away from this place, away from this crazed madman.

"Daddy, NO!" There is a loud bang and suddenly Kurt feels the strangest sensation he ever had. Like he had been pulled away from the world and thrown back at the same time. He feels queasy, dizzy, nauseous. He bends over and throws up, only he's not inside anymore. He's outside of the house! He crawls inside and beholds the most terrifying thing he will ever see in his entire life. Eva, laying on the floor in a puddle of blood, her father hunched over her, weeping, "Why God! Why!". Eva coughs and blood flows from the corner of her mouth.

"Kurt…. I… love you…."

Those were the last words she ever said. "YOU!", yells her father, more fearful and upset than angry. "You did this too her. Look what you've done!" Kurt falls to the floor and cries like a child until he blacks out.

"We are gathered here today to honor the lives of James Furlong and his daughter, Eva. Eva was shot by her father for unknown reasons, then James killed himself due to the anguish it caused him. While they may have passed on, their memory will last forever. Let us pay our last respects." As everyone in the chapel led by Father Hoffman did what he had instructed, Kurt hid in the shadows of the back of the church, unseen, unheard. He sat in silence, tears rolling down his face as though from a well. He had spent the night there, crying over his lover's coffin. No longer did Kurt eat. Sleep. Talk. His might as well have been in a different world, where God does not listen. Where are you now, God? He asks himself this in his head every moment of every day since that day. The day he killed Eva's father.


	5. How Kurt Wagner died

Disclaimer: I do not own Nightcrawler or any other character of Marvel Comics 

How Kurt Wagner Died

"YOU! You did this to her. Look what you've done!"

Now, at this point, Kurt collapses to the floor and cries out in emotional agony until he blacks out, but the real twist happens when Kurt acts with the unconscious mind…

"You will pay for what you have done, demon!", says James in pure loathing of the beast. He grabs the gun up from the floor and walks towards the destroyed animal on the floor. James points it at him, and says "Now, you will get what you deserve!"

Then, Kurt looks up at him with evil in his eyes. A sudden fury has entered his soul for his first love had been murdered. Kurt became the primal villain that everyone that judged him had expected when they saw him. Without knowing what he was doing, Kurt leaps up and pounces onto James and knocks him and the gun to the floor. Kurt strangles him with brute force, allowing no air to come or go. He then grabs the gun from the floor with his tail and aims it straight at his brain.

"You are more of a monster than I am! You fired the bullet with hatred, not acceptance! What happen to love your neighbor as yourself! Huh! I did nothing but love! I'll see to it you rot in Hell."

Kurt looks straight into his eyes and pulls the trigger. He watches as the life is drained from his face, the blank look of the soul leaving the body, and feels the pulse slowly stop in his neck. Kurt finally lets go of the corpse and struggles out of the room barely able to put one foot in front of the other. He steps over the threshold and falls to his knees.

"GOD! Why do you tempt me so! See what I have done! My love is gone! I murdered for her! When does it stop! Forgive me Father! For…give……me…". He slowly fell over and his face fell into the snow.

That night, he never came home. He stayed there on the ground through till morning. When Margali woke to find him not in bed, she panicked. She called upon everyone in the area to search for him. They continued through 9:00, even though Father Hoffman found him at 8:15.

"Oh, good Lord! Kurt? Kurt can you hear me? Friar Andrew, help me carry him to the cathedral."

"Nine, I cannot touch him. I do not want the devil's blood to touch my skin." Then, the Father noticed that his hands and his pants were stained with blood. He then slowly approached the door and pushed it open with a finger to discover the bloodshed that had spread across the floor. "Oh, Sweet Jesus! Andrew, do you think…?"

"Who else could it be? No person could be this cruel."

"Let's not jump to assumptions. This child is good, and has been touched by the Lord. He could not have done it."

"No matter what, I will not help carry the demon.", says Friar Andrew as he runs up the hill leading toward the center of town. What a way for a man of God to 'judge lest he not be judged'.

"Fine. I'll have to carry the poor soul myself." Father Hoffman picks up the boy and slowly carries him up the hill. The walk is tiring but the good man is using God's strength to help ease the burden. They reach the Cathedral and he sets Kurt on his bed. He goes and gets some smelling salts to wake him. Father Hoffman slowly passes the salts under Kurt's nose and he comes to.

"Father, what am I doing here?"

"Kurt, you must be completely honest with me. What happened last night?"

"I…I don't remember. It's all a blur. I…Oh God!"

"What? What is it Kurt?"

"I went to meet Eva's dad and and he was angry at me so he he tried to shoot me but I was outside and he shot Eva!"

"You're making no sense…"

"So so I got mad and I jumped on him and he called me a monster but I said 'No! You're the monster!' and I shot him, and then I woke up here."

"Alright. So you met this girl's father and he was mad at you. Why?"

"Because of the way I look and that I slept with his daughter."

"Okay. So he tries to shoot you but you're outside? How did you get outside?"

"I don't know. I just wanted to go away and he shot and I was outside. All I know is that I felt like I wanted to throw up."

"Oh. And he missed you because you're outside so he shot Eva on accident?"

"Right"

"Alright. So, you were mad, so you attacked him and…"

"He had a gun. He was going to shoot me."

"So you got his gun and shot him?"

"Yes. I didn't want to but I could not control myself. Please forgive me. I am so ashamed."

"Alright. Now, since you have confessed your sins and everyone will think the worst, I will do something that I know is wrong. I shall keep your story a secret and tell everyone a new story. Do not worry. Just lay low for a little while and I will protect you."

"Thank you Father."

"Where is he! Where is the beast!", they yelled at Father Hoffman when the townspeople had heard why Friar Andrew had to say. "He killed the blacksmith and his daughter. Where is Kurt Wagner!"

"He is dead. We found him on the stoop of James' house and when I discovered he had died, I disposed of his body in the forest, because such an abomination does not deserve a funeral."

A few minutes ago…

"Margali. Alright, here's what you need to do: Your son is alright but you will need to keep him out of sight for as long as you possibly can. I am going to tell the villagers that Kurt is dead, so you cannot even have him in the performances. You may even want a memorial service for him to make it believable. I am sorry, but you will probably need to leave Ingolstadt. It is either this or your son in grave danger. God bless."


End file.
